Superspecial A on VT; or, I amp up the avocado action

... and that sounds so much dirtier than I intended.

Home sick today with the snorting nose, hacking cough and p

ressure-filled cranium inevitable after air travel, I just happened* to have some Tofutti 'Be

tter Than Cream Cheese' on hand (*deliberately picked some up at the supermarket) so I decided to make some deluxe Avocado on Vegemite Toast.

Usually this food-of-the-gods is perfectly perfect with Nuttelex, but special occasions call for for special spreads. You have to be careful to let the toast cool enough so that the Tofutti doesn't melt, and to add a little more Vegemite than usual to counteract the extra softness.

Actually, a little bit of melt is pretty damn good:


The essential bread is Potts Sourdough - or, on trailer-trash occasion, plain white squares. Don't bother with wholemeal (too mealey) or multigrain (upsets the texture balance) or any of that white bread that toasts like air.

You can slice or mush your avocado, but don't muck about with adding lemon juice or salt - the Vegemite is totally enough. I like Hass avocados with their purplish bumpy ugly skin (the Shepherds just always seem too smooth and hard and unnaturally firm, like an LA woman past her second decade who thinks her Jacksonesque upturned nose and Botoxed-forehead suit her cheek implants and trout pout, setting off her mixing bowl-like plastic boobs and claw-nails ... have I been watching too much 'Girls of the Playboy Mansion'? Yes, I think so). Anyway, choose nice avocados (the Globe ones I've just discovered are nice .. weirdly huge, but nice).


A on VT - totally the bestest thing you can make for dinner, for breakfast, for hangovers, for sickness, for snacks, for treats, for pretending to be a bit healthy, or for comfort. Shlurp.

PS: Toast comes in pairs. Don't embarass yourself by only going for one piece. There's a reason toasters have no less than two slots.