Grill'd is not nice, or: I no longer want cheezeburger.

Dear readers,

You might remember how nice it was to find out from Grill'd that their bread, except the gluten-free version, was vegan. This was especially nice because they offer vegan burgers. It was nice of them to offer me some vouchers. It was nice of me not to complain when they expired 12 months before I received them, but I still enjoyed their nice food and wrote some nice posts here and here because it was nice to find nice cheap vegan food and it was nice of them to write back to me.

It would have been nice of Grill'd to let me know that their chips contain beef tallow. They knew I was vegan, so a little bit of lateral thinking when I emailed them would have been nice. That would have been nice customer service.

Thankfully, Tuxecat was nice enough to post over at The PPK about the beef tallow. A quick search of the internets revealed that Harriet was all over this back in 2007.


Dear, nice readers - Grill'd is not nice. They are meaniepants. And I don't like them any more.

Lots of love,

Miss T

I Can Has Cheezeburger? or: Grill'd, Lunchering with Lisa & the first veg-gathering of the new year

The last week or so has seen Miss T consume three vegan burgers in the city, which she considers an excellent use of her time.

The first was a return to Grill'd, now secure in the knowledge that their bread is vegan-ok (and I hasten to add that although I did receive freebie vouchers - expiry April 08 - I did in fact pay for this one myself in the name of journalistic integrity or because I hadn't remembered to bring them with me or because they hadn't arrived, or sumfink or nuffink).

I ordered the plain ol' veggie burger on panini, minus mayo and cheese, but with dill pickle. And it was good. Fresh beetroot and avocado played a starring role, and the addition of the pickle was on par with, say, deciding to plane the edges off a square, giving it a push and then making another three. I was really pleased with the Grill'd burger and left feeling like I'd had a freshly made sandwich rather than a naughty treat.


My second burgering was another Lunchering with Lisa, on the last day of the year and it was suitable in the extreme. Feeling between us a combination of hungover, tired, hungry, anticipating the upcoming requirements of NYE and a leedle bit naughty, we decided that the ever-faithful Lord of the Fries was our destination and salvation. We both ordered the standard vegan burger (despite being the Chilli Monster, I have developed bouts of hiccups from previous spicy burgers) and chips, Lisa's with gravy and mine with satay. I am devoted to the LoTF satay. De-voted. It's thick, it's creamy, it's real peanutty and it's unapologetic about how it will clog my arteries and expand my hips. But Lisa's gravy was just about as good and bad at the same time, and I think I've found an alternative condiment.

Below: satay on a cone of chips with an adorable chip-pokerer.


As always, the LoTF burgers had a pattie that has even omnis singing praises (Buzz is a fan) as it uses TVP to great, textured effect. When married with the soft, white fast-food bun, little Maccasesque pickles and general squishiness, this is a burger that screams to be eaten at 3am, lit by flourescent lighting, standing up whilst swaying under the influence. In short, it's the best kind of junk.

Below: a reasonably intact burger.


Below: mustard and sauce, cheeze'n'pickle, in the best fast food style.

Finally, or perhaps firstly, today marked my first vegan eatering gathering of 2009, with a small group meeting at the newly opened basekamp cafe in the CBD. A vegetarian cafe, basekamp is vegan friendly and is decked out with the sweetest decor around (and also the sweetest waitress, who apologised to us when we knocked over and broke a sugar dispenser!). The service by our smiley waiter was friendly and informed - no having to explain veganism - and it is a credit to such a new cafe that all of us repeatedly professed our intention to return (except for Kristy, non-CityWorker, poor thing!).

Kristy, Lidia, Pip, Dan and I all met on Little Bourke Street and actually queued outside the tiny cafe waiting for a big enough table. I was at first a little confused to see ham on the menu, given that I thought it was a vegetarian cafe, but it turns our that basekamp makes liberal use of mockmeat in its rolls, wraps and burgers.

Kristy and Pip (and Dan I think) had a Chik'n Roll on excellent panini, with the addition of pesto on the experienced suggestion of Lidia, who herself had a gourmet wrap with tuna. Dan also ordered the mayo garlic bread, which was a bit of an experimental serving with mayo, not much garlic, and an almost astringent, lemony taste. I didn't mind it, Kristy liked it, and Dan was not a fan.

Below: the Chik'n burger on panini with pesto.

Below: the gourmet tuna wrap with welcoming words behind.

I ordered a beef and BBQ sauce burger, which arrived smoky and encased in a crispy bun. The pattie had a stringy texture and tasted less mocky than many mock meats. The BBQ sauce well-coated the salad inside, including the charred capsicum, and the pesto on both top and bottom halves of the roll was generous and tasty.

Look at that char! Look at that sauce!

The generous double serve of pesto, and unprecedented grated carrot.



basekamp (no website available): 390 Little Bourke Street, Melbourne 3000. Ph, 9670 3569.

Grill'd Speaks, or: Vegan patties, vegan buns, vegan panini

Result!

I received a letter from the very prompt Amy at Grill’d. Upshot – the traditional buns and panini are dairy-free and suitable for all us dairy/ovo-rejectors. Her letters are below, sandwiching mine (disclaimer: damn right I took the freebie vouchers. Global financial crisis, tough times, interest rates blah blah … ).



Hi Rachel,

Thank you for taking the time to send us your feedback. I am hoping to clear up some confusion for you.

Our Panini and Traditional bun DO NOT contain any dairy whatsoever. These two buns are our main buns which are displayed on the counter and offered to every customer.

We have a new option on our menu now which is a gluten free option. This gluten free bun DOES contain some dairy. These buns are only suggested on the menu board and are only served when specifically requested for.

I investigated you visit the other day at Doncaster and discussed it with the manager. The bun that you were discussing was the gluten free bun option. I am so sorry if there was any confusion in this conversation.

So we really hope to see you back at Grill'd very soon for a totally vegan burger so long as you order the Panini or Traditional bun option. I would really love to send you some burger vouchers so that you can come back and enjoy some burgers on us.

Thanks and please contact me if you still have any questions.


Hi Amy,

That's great news! I'm really pleased to hear it. I think there was generally some confusion anyway about what was being discussed, because after explaining to the girl at the counter that I was vegan, and ascertaining that I couldn't eat the bread because of the dairy, she asked if I wanted a beef or chicken pattie with my salad!

I'd be very happy to grab some vouchers if you're happy to send them ... my address is (Miss T, T-Land, The Internets). I appreciate it!

Again, glad to hear the buns are dairy (and I presume egg!)-free, and thanks for your speedy response.

Cheers,
Rachel


Hey Rachel – yes egg free too. Vouchers will be in the mail tomorrow. Thanks again.

So go forth and burger, my children! Revel in the convenience food with fresh salad and purchasable outside of the CBD (sorry, LoTF...)!

Thanks for the link Bella! or: here's the letter I sent to Grill'd

Hi there,

Congratulations on offering a vegan pattie at Grill'd stores. It's a fantastic move and something that many food chains overlook, with many offering patties suitable for vegetarians but not vegans. As a vegan I really appreciate the opportunity to purchase fresh and healthy convenience food, and think that it's great that you so clearly advertise your vegan patties.

However, at my recent visit to the new Doncaster shopping centre store, I was very disappointed to discover that all the bread available contained milk. I ended up having a pattie on a plate of salad, which left me wondering why Grill'd has gone to so much effort to produce and advertise vegan patties, without following it through with proper menu options.

Bread made without animal products is readily available and of no discernible difference to milk that contains milk, whey etc. In fact, it tends to be of better quality. How about stocking bread that complements your vegan patties and really offers a new, different, healthy, cruelty-free and exciting vegan burger?

This is a great opportunity for Grill'd to offer a totally vegan menu option, filling a niche in the market for readily available, fresh convenience food. I would love to see Grill'd rectify this oversight, thus catering for vegans as well as people with lactose intolerances and other allergies.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Warm regards,

Miss T

Like totally awesome, or: An Open Letter to Grill'd

Hi Grill'd,

How are you? I just wanted to let you know that I'm glad you're doing so well. You seem to be springing up everywhere these days. Awesome.

I really like that you offer fresh salad ingredients. Awesome.

I really like that your chips are big chunky ones cooked with rosemary. Awesome.

And I really really love that you advertise that your veggie patties are, quote, "100 vegan!". Awesome!

So how come your burger rolls, paninis, wraps, and all other bready items are not vegan? So not awesome.

This is how I ended up at your brand spankin' new Doncaster store recently asking for a pattie on a plate of salad. And, like, fyi: it was a pretty stingy salad; the pattie was supermarket-meh; and after a good five minutes discussing the vegan-ness of the bread, which included me specifically saying that I was vegan, the checkout chick asking her manager (who asked his manager) if the bread had eggs or dairy, her informing me that it had milk, offering me a salad plate, me accepting etc etc - she then asked "like, what kind of pattie would you like? Like, beef, or chicken ...". So very definitely, in no way, totally not awesome.

So I guess what I'm trying to say, Grill'd, is that despite your awesome work in the vegan pattie department, you have totally not been awesome in the following-it-through, backing-it-up, taking-advantage-of-a-niche-market department (fyi: check out Lord of the Fries. Choice. Noice).

So, like, to become totally awesome again, here's what I reckon you should do:

1. Keep up the awesome work with the vegan patties, and advertising them;
2. Get some dairy and egg-free bread in, which is like so not hard and no-one will even notice;
   
3. Advertise Number 2;
4. Also advertise that you are like totally awesome at making totally awesome vegan burgers (at the mo' all of your veggie ones are dairy-ful); and
   
5. Train your staff in all of the above.

Sweet huh?

Also, not awesome is not having easily visible contact info on your site. Maybe it was there but I couldn't find it easily, and to be honest I was really put off by the little cartoons of cows and chickens working out to make themselves healthy and tasty for your customers. Gross.

If you did have easily visible and accessible contact details, then I would have also written you a letter (which would have been, like, full of grown up words and totally awesome) and I wouldn't have had to confine my bitch'n'moanin' to this blog, and I could have also totally been less passive-aggressive about it, and if you'd like written me back a totally awesome response I could have totally posted it and said how totally awesome you were.

Why all the awesome totallys? Because that's the image you're putting out there. And it would be the mostest totally awesome ever if you let your vegan patties have vegan bread too. Otherwise it's all kinda lame and pointless to even have vegan patties, let alone advertise them.

Awesome.